lately

Life has been busy... between Piper getting sick, and then getting sick myself, pushing hard to finish editing the images from a wedding I shot, Trevor's classes and workload being so big, and lots of stuff looming large in the distance... I haven't had much time (or reason) to write. I miss my blog.


I am at a point where I don't know what to do with it. I think this issue will be resolved when I have a website for my photography and sewing, but right now, this is a place where my business and personal life publicly intersect and sometimes it is weird. I feel like I can't be really open... I know some people come here mainly for updates on my work, but some people come because of everything else, and I guess I shouldn't be writing for my audience (I should just be writing) but it is hard to be honest when I don't know who my audience is. Anyway. It is a work in progress.


I am in a season with Piper where she is changing alot. She has been so independent and content just exploring the house, but as she gets bigger, she wants to be held more, she wants more interaction, more structured activities, more direction with her play. I want to give her that. I am re-learning how to work and be her mom. It has been a difficult process because feelings of fear creep in... fear that I am not giving her what she needs, fear that she is at home too much, fear that she will grow to resent me and the way our life is at home. I am just being honest. But I really believe that this in some ways is good for her... yes she needs my love and attention, but it is good for her to have that balanced with independence. It is good for her to see me do these things. It is good for our family that I work. It is good for me to grow and learn and improve, not only as a mom but as a creator as well. It is part of who I am and that is what I want to give to her... my dreams, my asthetic, my vision of creativity. I want her to take these things, change them, learn from them, and go her own way with them one day.


I am so excited that a friend is gifting me with a Minolta film setup.... a camera body and a couple lenses (hopefully there will be at least one fixed prime lens). I love the look of film. I love how sharp and clear it is. I love the 35mm format and how much you can fit in the frame (my dslr is not full frame... maybe one day). I won't be developing or printing myself... the film will go to the camera store, and then the digital copies will go onto a disc. That way I can edit them in photoshop if I want to. Super exciting.


I have a styled shoot this weekend that I could not be more thrilled about. This shoot is part of the inspiration. I love this client and I am so glad she chose me to help tell her visual story.


I have been using pinterest alot more. I will post a link to me once there is more on there. But I have to say... this photographer is my hero and I could pin every single image she makes. Her website is amazing as well. Also included some work by this artist. Her art is so incredibly beautiful.


I took the above pictures after listening to the podcasts by our friend John. Both of those talks are amazing. I miss being in his classes at Multnomah. I also cannot stop thinking about this sermon by Tim Keller (scroll down past the first one). Wow. And I have been reading Rick McKinley's book This Beautiful Mess. It is so, so good. I am really thankful for these resources, friends who love us, my church and Don's preaching, music, nourishing and delicious food, my little girl, my husband, and all the other gifts that God gives me on a daily basis just because he is love. These past few weeks have been really hard, but God has been so near. I know him more, I trust him more, and my marriage is stronger despite difficulty. I am thankful that he gives me beauty for ashes.

Be back again soon friends.
xo